by Red Velvet
The Burning Man festival changes your life. It may not be in an overtly obvious way. The community (known as Burners) take a different approach to public co-existence. Labels and boxes are tossed into the desert fire. Announcing I was a lesbian had as much as validity as dollar bills on the Playa. … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
I’m a Londoner. The British passport I possess though my family is a European hybrid of Ashkenazi and Safardic Jew. I’ve visited at least 80% of the 48 ceremonial counties etched into England’s 50352 square miles … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
Could you imagine anything less sexy than a date at the gym? Unless you’re a muscle Mary or an aspiring PE teacher, hell hath no fury like an overweight woman in ill-fitting lycra. So the saga began when the object of my desires (the ‘eat sushi off my…frame’ lady mentioned in 12 hours) enticed me for a free personal training session … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
Let’s get the unprofessional part of this review out the way first. I have not fancied a leading lady as much since Chloë Sevigny caused havoc in Hicksville in the coveted Boys Don’t Cry. Mariela Vitale pulsated desires right the way through my cuerpo … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
It was about 1962, I called an old friend and said if you know where the lesbians go please take me…somebody brought Thea over and we ended up dancing and we immediately just fit.
I’m no hard-hearted cynic however this documentary caught me blubbering five times in 61 minutes; no crocodile tears in this house believe me. This story charts the life-long love of two New York based lesbians, Edie a wholesome country girl and Thea the high flying PhD student. … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
From a raw food dinner party to bedroom romp to a clerical faux pas, this particular 12 hours had all the ingredients of a truly wrong sequence of events. Sometimes when you’re on a quixotic roll, you cannot apply the brakes especially when a hot girl and high libido are concerned. … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
There are people in this world so dogmatically rigid and fixed in their views that an answer to every dilemma doesn’t need to be second guessed – it is always logical to navigate towards. Then there are those people who usually have a pretty good idea of the pros and cons of any given situation, especially where more complex emotional questions are thrown haphazardly into the proverbial mix. Finally, there are people like me who often don’t have a bloody clue which way to turn, … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
A fantasy in everyone’s naughty goody drawer, no mentally active lesbian can honestly deny having at least one masturbatory session revolving around two girls positioned at either ends of their writhing frame, poking and prodding every orifice with the tenacity of a Cheshire cat. Of course, a threesome can be pre-meditated or one of those random late night developments that can give you the best fucking orgasm of your life, or leave you out in the cold looking at your toes curl against the underfloor heating of a disenfranchised en suite. Alas, I was subject to the latter form of self-deprecating, podiatric torture in an evening which had started out rather well. … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
Alcohol. The social lubrication of the nation, dampening the open pores of folk seeking a confidence booster or an innate ability to dance like a twat. Be warned though ladies, does the boozy Dutch courage simply act as a placebo? Yes it may make us more physically relaxed, but can we really mentally engage? Can we read her stare when it’s rooted to the floor, or penetrate her periphery as she mentally tugs down your zipper? … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
Why do some of the most potent emotional casualties seem to take place at the Candy Bar? There is almost a weary inevitability of ending up in that narrow galley of nostalgia every six months, when after a healthy fill of vodka lemonades it always seems like a good idea. Until you arrive that is, and see an ex who you have dexterously managed to avoid with all the cunning and guile of three years intensive work. … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
Just open a tatty tabloid or subscribe to a gay RSS feed, every A, B and D ‘celeb’ has been getting papped. During the Naughties, usually while sharing a same-sex game of tonsil tennis on an exclusive dancefloor, which strangely enough always seemed to exude just the right amount of lesbian chic for male titillation. … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
According to popular opinion, I work for a ‘cool’ company. For this universal perception garnered by the press to ring true, I am asked this million dollar question daily, “what do you actually do?” I answer, of course, that during my flexi three day week, I fan under synthetic palm trees, type on vibrating massage chairs while exposed, bejewelled ladies strum a virtual ukulele around my eco-friendly work station. Well two out of three ain’t bad! … Continue Reading
by Red Velvet
Who would have thought ten eventful years would have passed so fleetingly with more than a healthy dose of misadventure and calamity. So what’s changed in the ten years that I traded dick for dyke and teenage kicks to Sapphic licks? Certainly not the dating drama that’s for sure! Talking nostalgically over a morally challenging game of Scruples last night, I got into a retrospective with old friends Eva and Alexia. … Continue Reading
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