TMC’s picks of what to see at the London Lesbian and Gay Film Festival 2011

by Lemon Tart

If you’re the kind of person who preplans their outfits before you go to sleep, and has a panic attack if you forget to bring your special concoction of daily vitamins on holiday with you, don’t bother reading this. I suspect you’ve already booked the films you’re watching at LLGFF, and planned your journey route to each showing on TFL.

If you’re more like me, this will be useful. Unless, of course, you don’t like cinema, London, or gay people. Which begs the question, what are you doing on this site? Just saying…

Basic facts:

Main website is here, it runs from Thursday 31st March – Wednesday 6th April, and its facebook fanpage is here.

What to see (that hasn’t sold out):

Gigola: tickets still available for Monday, 1.50 pm

Ok. Honestly I have NO idea if this film will be any good. But I’m not even going to bother to find reviews. Why? Here’s what the LLGFF site has to say about it: “It’s 1963 and Paris is sizzling with sex. The stylishly butch Gigola spends her days roaming chic Parisian cafés, taking on the male criminal underclass at its own game, enticing pretty femmes away from their pimps, breaking hearts and making a few enemies along the way.” – RIDICULOUS therefore no doubt AMAZING.

A Marine Story: tickets still going for Tues, 8.45 pm

A Marine has to quit years of military service due to Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, and returns home to her repressive hometown. Won Outfest’s Grand Jury Award. Oh, and one of the actresses in it, Paris P Pickard is easy on the eye.

The Owls + Hooters: tickets still going for Sunday at 7.30 pm

This is apparently “a piece of collective art about age, politics, race, desire and gender anxiety”. That’s a lot of themes to pack into one film. But the LLGFF site also says this lesbian noir is “enjoyably strange”. Whatever that means. It might be good, it might not be good. This article’s so decisive and helpful isn’t it.

Sarah Waters in Conversation: Monday at 8.45 pm

Don’t even deny there wasn’t once a time in your life when you read every Waters book you could get your mitts on. Go to this and listen to the high priestess herself.

Where to eat:

Canteen is just nearby – take a look at their menu. Traditional English nosh. YUM.

Tesco – I can’t usually be arsed to spend loads of money on food all day… Your cheapest cheapo Tesco is just over the river at 125 The Strand.

Where to flirt:

In the queue. I’m not exactly sure how, as I’m not a very good flirt. But there are lots of people in queues, and they’re probably a bit bored, so you might as well swoop in.

At the BFI bar. It’s where everyone gathers. And it’s well flirty.

What not to say:

“Oh, have you seen Loving Annabelle? Isn’t it great.”