Tuesday Top Ten.. Things We Have Learnt from the Real L-Word

by Petit Fours

It’s like the L-word, but real. You can and should watch it. Ten things we have learnt from this great great show:

1) Illene Chaiken is a great benfactor to the lesbian community – she wrote the L-word for us and now this crazy thing. On behalf of the lesbian umwelt, I just want to say thank you.

2) Not everyone in LA looks as good as Jennifer Beals. It’s a bit disappointing of course, but in a way, it’s affirmative.

3) If you play drinking games with the Real L-Word - where you drink everytime someone wears sunglasses inside, says “LA fashion week” or uses the word “situation” to describe the fall-out from sleeping with three girls at once – you get wasted.

4) People don’t need to be hot or fast-talking or funny for me to watch them. In fact they can be average, a bit nuts and not very bright and I’m still completely compelled. The magic of reality TV hit me all over again with this series.

5) Dreadful people get lots of sex. I knew this anyway.

6) Getting lots of sex can be called “having the power of the clam”.

7) LA lesbians spend some hard cash. How about taking your girlfriend to a hotel for Valentine’s Day, hiring out a private gazebo for dinner, then paying for a really huge trail of rose petals to show her how to get from the door to the bed. How about that eh? Not very RECESSION AWARE is it.

8) On the flip side of the Valentine’s day spectrum, it is possible to give your girlfriend your house key in a plastic ice cream cone as a Valentine’s Day present.

9) In LA they really do say things differently. I’ve mentioned “clam” and “situation”. There are also phrases like “I don’t care how much it costs – What’s my middle name? Nikki Gucci Price”, and words like “douchebaggy” (what Whitney is not, according to herself), “futch” (a femme butch), “pants” (a butch) and “polished” (what lesbians are like in LA but not in New York – apparently).

10) They’re doing the next series in Brooklyn. SCORE. Basically, that means more of the scraggy, semi-European types that we have in London, better fashion, and fewer sunglasses – though I won’t prented I don’t love them. The New York Times wrote about it, and AfterEllen practically promises it. So London for Series Three please.

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extra Real L-Word words and some inter-city bitching from gracethespot

Related: The L Word = awesome?