Music Video Monday… Kele Okereke – Tenderoni
For those of you who didn’t know, the former lead singer of Bloc Party, Kele Okereke, recently came out and has begun talking more about his sexuality. There’s a lot of talk about celebrities coming out recently, from Gaga to Lady Sovereign to that American country singer, and whether or not this simple action even has any meaning anymore. There’s a persuasive argument that it does – our culture has evolved into one that revolves around a cult of celebrity and fame, and so the role models of this day and age tend to be famous actors and singers as opposed to astronauts or writers.
It’s obviously important, then, that we have a range of role models to look up to – not just straight or white men or women, but someone who’s a bit broader in scope. And Kele, a gay black man, certainly widens our viewpoint of what a successful gay person looks like. Plus, as a King’s alumnus myself, I can’t help but feel a little KCL pride.
He’s been ‘out’ for several years now. Perhaps not on the cover of attitude posing in a teeny pair of shorts saying “I’m Gay”, but certainly being honest when asked in interviews, putting it in his songs, and generally being pretty open about it without a big coming out “moment”.
Fair play to him, but surely this sort of coming out is a bit unnecessary in a lot of cases? The obsession with this kind of thing harks back to an era when a lot of older celebrities only felt secure in coming out late in their careers, and it was a big event when they did. If Kele already basically acknowledged he was gay, why do we need to make a big thing about this?
Yeah, I agree with Ewan on this. I think the gay community’s fixation on who’s gay and out is becoming slightly pedestrian. To paraphrase my sister, when I told her the Jesse St. James character in Glee was gay, ‘so what?’. And as far role models go, I don’t know many people who think there is a typical gay and successful look, or that they are from any one ethnic group. Kele being black in this context I think is a bit irrelevant, as is his being gay.
@ Hmmm. I agree in part with both of you, but there is something about your post which suggests that gay people have reached normalisation point, which they haven’t, and that modern Western society is colour-blind, which it’s not.
It’s fantastic that your sister is so knowlegable and oblivious to the sexuality of others; unfortunately, the majority are not. As a “straight looking” femme, I have spent years battling harrassment, endless questions, discrimination and intrusions from people based soley on my sexuality. I have also been dropped from a mainstream music contract, in part because I was openly queer and I wrote songs about women. The mainstream music industry is still incredibly hetronormative, as are many industries based on image, so I think it’s okay to praise people for Kele for being out. So many don’t feel able to be.
The fact that Kele is black and out is also important, because he serves as a role modle for other young black, gay men, who, as a minority, have very little representation in the public eye. Especially in Africian/Caribean culture, homophobia is still very much alive. A great deal of music which is targetted at black people (the white people who run the music industry assume that black people only really dig ‘bitches and guns’) contains solely straight imaginary. Therefore, Kele’s actually pretty rare; a black person, making music that many narrow-minded people see as ‘white’, singing about how he likes boys. I think getting a big yay from the gays is totally due..
I do however totally agree with normalisation, and the reduction of the ‘OH MY GOD HE’S GAY’ knee-jerk shit the media pull. However, sadly, all that press that we’re so familiar with only goes to emphasise that the fact that queer is still not seen as normal. The more Keles we have out and proud and vocal in the public eye, the more visible queers are. And the more visible we are, in a non-OMG way, the more likely we are to become just part of the spectrum.
I think the “Oh,who gives a rat’s ass?” argument would only work if people didn’t give a rat’s ass.
p.s : WOW, this is long.
I totally disagree with the above. The fact is that in Britain we are part of a lucky minority: around the world thousands of LGBT kids are unable to come out every year because of their families’ and governments’ views and policies on gay people. British musicians are well-known internationally, and the more public they are about being gay the more confident young people everywhere will be to be honest about who they are.
I was a teenager and then an adult in this current century, and it still massively irks me when my contemporaries question the importance of being as out and proud as possible in 2010. I grew up in the UK, and for a number of reasons (religous background, not enough education on the subject, living in the countryside) found it incredibly difficult to come out. If it was hard for me, I can’t imagine what it must be like for young people in countries where being gay is against the law, and conventional marriage+kids is the only option.
Celebrities being very loud and proud about their sexual orientation is a very confident and valuable choice to make. Sure, it’s up to them, and they don’t have to do it. But if they speak out, my 14-year-old self thanks them for that.
Lols Fairy Cake just seen you made a comment which has just appeared too. My “totally disagree with the above” was meant to come after Eccles’ comment.
I, in no way meant to downplay the importance of gay visibility, it is no small thing to be out as a celebrity. If you read my post carefully you’ll notice my main gripe was with the OP’s suggestion that there is a unique brand of queer celebrity which Kele goes against. I understood this to mean that as a BLACK gay man he should be lauded for being open about his sexuality. I don’t agree with this. I mean, – ‘And Kele, a gay black man, certainly widens our viewpoint of what a successful gay person looks like.’ What exactly does a successful gay person look like?
I hate to say it, but this seems like the sort of narrow minded thinking gay people have had to put up with for ages, I mean as a ‘straight looking’ femme would you want to be propped up as a role model because you go against the ‘standard’ gay look that has been propagated by the media for so long?
I also didn’t mean to imply we’d reached a gay normalisation point, from personal experience I know we haven’t.
@Eccles
I think I did grasp what you were saying originally though I went off on the normalisation tangent. You seem to have made two agruments here (please dispute if I’m wrong)…
1) The fact that Kele is black should have no bearing on how important/helpful it is in the grand scheme of things that he is openly queer.
2) That there is not a view, in the media or in the public eye, of what a typical ‘successful’ queer person looks like.
I don’t think DFC was trying to say that successful queer people only look one way, but she was insinuating that the public are only used to seeing successful WHITE queer people, and that Kele being black and out is both rare and aids people to widen their perspectives of what a gay person looks like.
Although there may not be a single, blanket stereotype of what a succesful gay woman or man looks like, it’s certainly safe to say that there are far more out white men and women in the public eye than there are out men and women from minorities. This is mostly to do with the systemic racism which is irrevocable meshed into Western culture. In the same way that patriarchy meant lesbianism was recognised and represented decades after male homosexuality was, minorities are only just starting to be visible as a queer people. Heavily religious traditions and a long and aggressive cultural hetronormativity do not make things easier.
R.e: your comment about being a ‘straight looking’ femme, and whether I would be comfortable being held up as a role model simply because I embodied a slightly different aesthetic. In short, yes I would be comfortable. In fact, (I mean this in no way to sound narcissistic), I was once a writer for a publication where I experienced in a very minute way what it was like to be a femme ‘role model’ (strong words). During my time there, I received emails from young girls who’s vision was clouded by tired stereotypes of ‘what a lesbian looks like’. They were both shocked and relieved to see that there was a queer woman out there who wasn’t shaven-headed and liked wearing skirts. I hadn’t really done anything but be visible, but for them, my sheer existence as a girly lesbo gave them a tangable example of ‘their’ type of sexuality.
You say you think gay visibility is important, but if only white, middle-class, ‘gay acting’ queers are visible, then it’s only mostly white, middle-class, ‘gay-acting’ people who will be able to idenitify with them and feel inspired enough to come out. Obviously, all our experiences are different, but on a basic physical and cultural level, a young black boy bought up in East London would probaby feel more inspired by Kele’s omission of his sexuality to, say, Graham Norton’s. Fundamentally, role models are most effective when we can see a little bit of ourselves in them, no matter how shallow that association may seem.
So, yeah. That is why Kele’s being black and openly gay is important. And when I hear about the next openly-gay Bollywood filmstar, I’m going to throw a fucking party ;)
Wow, I haven’t checked this all day – to clarify, what I meant is not that there is a definition of what exactly a successful gay person looks like, but that there are very few celebrities who are willing to come out as gay until the ends of their careers, and that as not just a gay man, but a black gay man, it’s incredible that he’s done so. Homophobia is, as FC says, broadly prevalent in Black (in the political sense of the word) culture. There’s a great exercise we do at Black LGBT meetings where we ask attendees to name as many Black, openly LGBT celebrities as they can – and rarely do we ever get any more than ten*. It’s my opinion that having more role models in that community, that is, having gay celebs that look less like the Brady Bunch, is very important. Still.
* – the exercise and presentation were created by Mas Naina, former NUS LGBT Black Student’s officer and NUS BSC LGBT officer. It’s an excellent presentation.
“Celebrities being very loud and proud about their sexual orientation is a very confident and valuable choice to make. Sure, it’s up to them, and they don’t have to do it. But if they speak out, my 14-year-old self thanks them for that.”
I certainly agree on the ‘proud’ part; it’s the ‘loud’ part I’m not sure about. I see the place of big role models, but surely accepting different models of queer success also means accepting different models of ‘coming out’.
Look at this for example:http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2010/03/12/bloc-partys-kele-on-coming-out-to-his-parents/
“The reason I’m doing it is whenever I go out , I’m always stopped by young, gay kids who say it’s really refreshing and encouraging to see someone like me being out in a relatively mainstream band.”
So he clearly already was visible and prominent and ‘inspiring’ or whatever to his fans, and to those who are interested in his music. Nothing’s really changed: he’s done press interviews that position him as a more mainstream pop star, to promote a poppy new solo single. So yes, maybe he’s more visible to casual fans and the general public, but why should he need to be? Kele was always incredibly private in interviews about everything, not just his sexuality; this current push seems to be going for a ‘celebrity’ status that he always rejected. I don’t blame him for it, and I’m sure it’s a good thing, but you don’t need to aim for the mainstream, celebrity culture, to be a gay icon, role model, whatever.
Re: ‘normalisation’. I die a bit inside every time someone tells me that teenagers these days are just fine with it all. Maybe if you’re from a liberal, middle class background with friends from similar, this might be the case, but there are still huge numbers of kids these days who will never acknowledge their sexuality, who are made to feel ashamed or terrified because of it, or who will attack others for being different, and we shouldn’t kid ourselves that things have really changed too much. My problem is with the obsession with a certain model of coming out as any sort of answer.
@Fairy Cake, I see what you’re saying, and I agree with some of the points you raised. But I feel DFC’s use of the word ‘Successful’ as opposed to ‘Celebrity’ is what I have an issue with. I suppose in a celebrity fixated society, role models are bound to be celebrities, even in queer circles. However, I know some ‘successful’ gay and out people who are leaders in industry and contribute massively to their communities, these people don’t fit a general mold, and are from all walks of life and ethnic backgrounds.
I spent some of my teenage life growing up in a country where it’s still illegal to be gay, and I can tell you my role models were not the celebrities who were loud and proud as I couldn’t identify with them, and they lived in a world completely different from mine. So the arguement Lemon Tart raised about celebrities having a huge following and maximum impact on queers all over the world feels way too simplistic for me.
DFC, I won’t talk about proportional representation and why there are fewer out celebrities that young black people can point out and look up to, but I think the sooner we all dispel this notion of what success is and what a role model is, then the sooner young people can look to members of their own community who are making massive inroads in the battle against homophobia and discrimination, though they might not be on TV or on the covers of NME.
Having said this, I acknowledge we all have our views and opinions on such matters, some of these are based on our own experiences so I’ll agree to disagree on some points, and agree on others.
“The fact is that in Britain we are part of a lucky minority: around the world thousands of LGBT kids are unable to come out every year because of their families’ and governments’ views and policies on gay people. British musicians are well-known internationally, and the more public they are about being gay the more confident young people everywhere will be to be honest about who they are.”
Agree 100% with Lemon Tart
I love reading our debates back. Most of our posters are so polite and accepting of each other’s viewpoints. It’s very refreshing…and very rare on the internetz! xx
I just woke up and thought: I am most probably in love!