Cake cooks… Err cake

by Lemon Tart and Fairy Cake

Ever wondered what Cake Towers looks like? Well, it’s exactly like Mad Men. Multiple Joans file our articles for us on Ollivetti Valentine typewriters, there’s always a glass of scotch to be drunk and we periodically take holidays in California (read: Blackpool), coming back refreshed and bemused by that crazy new world beyond London.

However, there is one key difference. For a start, we don’t have an office. Oh ok, so two differences: we don’t smoke, we eat cake. (Or at least, we smoke much less). Our love of baked goods smothered in frosting is not only a non-so-subtle sexy allusion and convenient naming method for those of us you can’t come out to various people in our lives… it’s also a daily obsession. Basically, our lunch breaks look a lot like this (watch out for the sneakers):

During one such sojourn last week, Fairy Cake and I decided it would be great to share a couple of our favourite cakey recipes with you. In between quaffing champagne and designing new wigs, we somehow managed to pen the following…

…

Fairy Cake’s Chocolate Cake

150g dark chocolate, broken into small pieces
250g butter
200g caster sugar
5 Eggs, separated into whites and yolks
100g corn flour

For the chocolate coating…

200ml double cream
200g dark chocolate, broken into small pieces
25g Butter

This cake tastes particularly good having been refrigerated. So, if you can, resist the urge to inhale the thing at first sight and serve it cold.

1. Melt the chocolate in a microwave on a low heat or in a bowl over a pan of simmering water until smooth. Set aside to cool.

2. In a mixing bowl, cream together the butter and 100g (don’t stick it all in, you over-zealous whatsit) of caster sugar until light and fluffy. Beat in the egg yolks.

3. In a separate mixing bowl, whisk the egg whites until stiff and peaking. Add in the remaining sugar and whisk again until thick and glossy.

5. Pour the chocolate into the creamed butter mixture and mix in well.

6. Using a metal spoon fold in the whisked egg whites and the cornflour. This cake really is all about the mixing. If your arm isn’t at least a bit achey, you ain’t working hard enough.

7. Transfer the cake mixture to a greased lined 20cm cake tin.

8. Bake for 40 minutes until the cake is set and cooked through. Don’t be tempted to check the consistency by sticking your fork in, or it’s all going to collapse.

9. Remove from oven and cool in the tin for 15 minutes then invert onto a serving plate. Allow to cool.

10. To make the chocolate coating, bring the double cream to the boil in a pan. Place the chocolate in a heatproof bowl and pour over the double cream, mixing together well. Mix in the butter and spread the chocolate coating over the cake using a palette knife or spoon. Allow to cool, then serve.

Lemon Tart’s Lemon Cake

…

6 oz Self Raising Flour

6 oz Sugar

6 oz Margarine

3 eggs

2 lemons

Lots of Icing Sugar

More margarine

…

To bake the cake…

Sorry about the old-fashioned, non-EU regulatory measurements. It’s just that if you use ounces to measure the above even a dunce like me can produce something both edible and vaguely impressive.

As you can tell, there’s a sort of formula going on above… choose the amount of eggs you’re going to use and then double things for the flour, sugar and margarine in equivalent ounces. 3 eggs makes an average cake-sized cake, 6 would make a very large one and 10 eggs would make enough mini cakes to feed a large crowd of around 4000 baying for fish and loaves (give them this and they may think you’re the second coming. Possibly).

ANYWAY. Basically:

1. Put the flour, sugar, margarine and eggs into a bowl. Mix them with an electric whisk until smooth.

2. Squeeze half a lemon into the mixture. Grate the outside of one lemon in too, making sure you wash the wax off the lemon first.

3. Pour the mixture into a round cake tin, greasing and flouring the tin first.

4. Cook at 180 degrees for around three quarters of an hour – keep checking progress by piercing the cake with a metal skewer – if the skewer has cake mixture on it then it’s not ready.

To make the frosting…

1. I use margarine for my lemon frosting. I think it tastes amazing but I also think wasabi paste tastes great on its own so my judgement is perhaps flawed… so if you like you can use butter which is both more traditional and creamier.

2. Sieve about a cereal bowl-sized portion of icing sugar into a bowl. Squeeze in the juice of half a lemon too, and then grate the skin of a whole lemon in. Stir, and add two pudding spoons of margarine. Stir well and add more icing sugar until it all has a very thick consistency.

Make sure the cake is coldish (but it in the fridge for 15 mins if not) and then spread the icing over the top. Refrigerate for at least an hour, grate more lemon skin over the top, and you’re done.

…

photograph by Holly